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Friday, June 22, 2012

The Forsaken Promising Future

Our children are so intelligent that we want so much for them.  We want to provide them with what we have not been able to get when we were their ages.  The best education, the healthiest food, the most fun-filled weekends, the best doctors, the most conducive environment for an ideal upbringing, and the list goes on.  However, most parents are not super human beings to be capable of meeting these desires for their children.  Some settle for moderation, after weighing the pros and cons. A few stuck to their idealistic dreams; almost irrational dreams.  
For those who are stubborn about their dreams, and the number of like individuals are on the increase,  of which the mass media has a part in ensuring these dreams are kept, the state of matter is not that up to mark.  While one may desire something, it does not mean all other factors are going to fall into one's plans as one hopes.  A father/mother may have a very lucratic career to supply him/her with the monetary means to materialise his/her dreams, but he/she may not have the quality time to spend with his/her child. That means the child will be deprived of a father's/mother's perfect love in the form of companionship.  Consequently, it is a downer with respect to the child's upbringing. 
The  child will always be missing his/her parents and he/she will brought up by individuals other than his/her own parents.  He/She will pick up habits, ideas or ideology from people other than his/her own parents. Usually parents will experience a barrier between their own child and themselves after long or frequent absences. Most of the time these influences are not as favourable as the couple hope to be, as expected of most individuals who are always suspecting the good intentions of other people.  All these pose as a form of stress to the parents especially the mother whose maternal instincts are too strong to be satisfied with the care given by another individual other than herself. It is quite a tough and stressful role for parents to be able to balance a very successful career with family life.  That is why nowadays, marriages are getting broken and children forsaken. Disappointed wives, overworked husbands, crying neglected children and forgotten old parents become part and parcel of modern living. All for the sake of progress.
It is a very tough ride and only very few can make it.  Those who are on easier rides are those who manage to balance the two well and usually, the degree of success will be measured in accordance to the amount of non-sacrifice too. Don't sacrifice anything for the children and family, stay put at your job, and definitely, you are on your way up the level of corporate success, that is if you are working in a corporate office. Another reason for the reluctance of some women to give up their careers is always the fear of unfaithful husbands who will later leave them cold for another woman. How sad.
The group of people who have happy children are what you call the 'could have been', meaning they could have been the top-notched executives who have forgone all for the sake of their families.  Some of these women have spent years of education and also have years of working experience.  We may wonder whether there is ever going to be a different situation in years to come. Is there ever going to be a time when women can go on with their dream careers without worrying about their family too much but just work for the benefit of the nation and community? 
Is there ever going to be a situation when schools,  school buses, public places among many other places are absolutely safe? Are teachers going to be like 'mothers in schools' , truly caring for their pupils as they will care for their own children, imparting true , reliable knowledge and inculcating in the children under their charge good moral habits and civic mindedness?  Are schools going to be built in the best location or locality? Are they going to be built on top of hills, where it is breezy, away from the busy, dangerous traffic? Is the school guard or housekeeper a person with a  trusted backgound? Is the canteen operator a person who has a loving heart and who cooks and serves the food as if hes/her own children are also eating it? 
If the community is not willing to love our children, maybe we have to let the state take over.  Maybe we will have really large state owned care centres for children from infants to 12 yar olds. Maybe we will have prim and proper, responsible wardens to oversee these children while their parents are at work, somewhat like what the communist countries used to do. Maybe we will have our own version, a democratic one,  or a few of them , each suitable for the different religious background, so that everyone will be comfortable and happy, no discrimination, no stepping on another's toes, having due respect for each other's differences, for the sake of our children.  Yes , for the sake of our children. That is really funny but maybe that is how some of these problems are going to be solved if in-laws, relatives, friends, baby sitters or maids, private daycare centres or what else they have , all fail and people just cannot go to work without worrying their heads off. Babies being killed, abused and abandoned by crazy babysitters or maids, babies mishandled by careless daycare centre operators, small children raped by bus drivers or school guards or even step relatives, are news that are becoming more often heard these days.How exasperating!  Surely there is a better way for our children.  They are depending on us to think of a way.  They are depending on us. Let's not disappoint them further.

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